The dental work was an excellent affair, by the way. 10/10, would try again if I had an extra kidney.
Loved the place. He was willing to get my late lion fish taxidermied late at night (4am) he picks up literally at any time of the night! Seriously! I will always go to him for all of my future aquatic taxidermy needs.
Joe was helpful and accommodating during my most recent dental ordeal, the specifics of which have been lost to the effects of a miasma of pain-dulling narcotics. Joe was more than happy to write me as many morphine prescriptions as I needed, which is usually more than someone without a tooth made of cement does.
My decision to visit Joe's Taxidermy and Orthodontics Museum was calculated, as I cannot allow more than a few black market organ sellers in my general vicinity. With the liver market these days, I can't handle more than a bit of competition. Accordingly, I invited Joe to visit my practice anytime, free of charge. It'll be a pity putting him in my freezer, I think. He's a big-hearted guy, though, and I think that cardiovascular system of his would fetch a pretty penny.
this is a very safe establishment. this is the safest institution i have ever had the pleasure of doing business with. very safe. safe taxidermy, safe orthodontics. so safe that i felt at home. so now, this safe place is my home. i live here now, i'm safe.
Only complaint was that one time I got squirrel teeth when he was replacing my incisors, but it turned out to be great. I can snap carrots in half like nobody's business... But I've noticed a strange craving for nuts...
It was honestly a God thing I found this place. I normally taxidermy people, not animals. But Joe was very helpful taxidermying my neighbors dog, and he even delivered it to their doorstep. They were so surprised! They liked it so much, the children cried tears of joy. It really killed two stuffed birds with one stone, cause that dog was really annoying. Barking late at night, pooping in other people's yards. I really did my neighbors a favor, and I couldn't have done it without Joe. He's a real stand up guy.
Joe and I got to talking, and found we share a number of interests, including posing as medical professionals and removing patients' organs while they sleep. We also enjoy taxidermy of victims we have completely cleaned out over the course of several visits. Joe showed me his collection, and we compared the number of victims we'd seen on the back of our milk cartons. Joe said sometimes he likes to keep them alive on his contraband medical equipment until they appear on a carton, at which point he shows them the carton, removes life support, and harvests the rest of the body, which is then taxidermied and posed provocatively in his underground gallery. I am but a humble felon next to Joe's immense collection.
Joe insisted on full sedative and anesthesia during the work performed on my teeth. I agreed reluctantly, as I tend to use a similar technique to incapacitate my victims prior to processing and storage in my basement freezer. I awoke to the feeling of a cavity in my abdomen that had not been there before and the faint smell of formaldehyde. Further examination revealed a scar on my abdomen. Joe returned, and, after a bit of questioning, told my they had always been there, and the formaldehyde was for animal processing. I trust Joe, so I didn't think much of it.
Despite my initial misgivings about an establishment based on tooth-straightening and animal preservation, I was pleasantly surprised during my visit to Joe's Taxidermy and Orthodontics.
Due to a tragic childhood accident, my left incisor is composed entirely of Portland cement, while my right wisdom tooth is cast from iron chemically removed from the blood of several hundred pigs. As a side effect, I am often half-dead of lime poisoning, but I'll be damned if I don't always taste a hint of bacon grease. You win some; you lose some.
Joe S Taxidermy And Orthodontics Museum is a US Museum based in Cedar Park, Texas. Joe S Taxidermy And Orthodontics Museum is located at 2006 Hoffman Ct, Cedar Park, TX 78613, USA.
Please contact with Joe S Taxidermy And Orthodontics Museum using information above: Address, Phone number, Fax, Postal code, Website address, E-mail, Facebook. Find Joe S Taxidermy And Orthodontics Museum opening hours and driving directions or map. Find real customer reviews and ratings or write your own review.